Remember When We Page 6

  Part of The Four. We had tattoos of crosses on our necks to remember our fallen ones. Claudius was the only one to have his on his cheek. He wore his for his first wife who was murdered by a terrorist, Dante for his sister, and Alex for his brother.

  I wore mine for Marshall.

  “Let her go,” I said in a slow and purposeful manner. Slow so he could utilize the time to see the seriousness in my ‘don’t fuck with me expression’.

  “Who the fuck are you to give me orders?” The guy holding Lyssa balked.

  These were mafia guys, I could tell. They were Italian like me and had that badass look. Not too bright though.

  “Tony, that guy is one of the crew from Chicago,” said the guy who recognized me. “Just let her go.”

  “This ain’t no fucking Chicago.” He set his hand on the table.

  Big mistake. I grabbed one of my throwing knives from my back pocket and whipped it out so fast they never saw it coming. Lyssa screamed when the knife lodged itself in the space between big mouth’s thumb and forefinger.

  It was then that he released her.

  “Fuck this.” The guy who recognized me snapped. He got up and left all except big mouth followed him.

  I guess he was the one with no brains. Fine he could stay and I’d school him on who I was.

  Lyssa got up out of his lap and backed away.

  “Gio, just leave him. I’m fine.” She was saying.

  “Yes, she is fine.” Big mouth Tony said standing up and squaring off with me. This fucker seriously thought he could take me. “You interrupted what could have been a good time too.”

  “The lady asked you to leave her alone and you didn’t. That’s a problem.”

  Of course, by now we had the attention of everyone within eye and ear shot.

  “Who are you? Or rather who do you think you are?” He had the gall to ask me.

  I just laughed at him. “Don’t worry about that man. Unlike you I don’t have to walk around with my dick in my hands to prove I’m a man.”

  He didn’t like that one bit. Then the fool thought he could throw one at me.

  I simply grabbed his hand and squeezed. Squeezed hard while I kept eye contact the whole time. I dug into his bones and joints and he crumpled as I crushed his fucking hand.

  He cried out from the pain loudly, but I just watched, watched and watched. When I saw blood break through his skin I let him go, not wanting to get any on me. Never could be too careful these days.

  He was on the floor in pain. “Do yourself a favor, if you don’t know a person and your buddies scuttle like mice, run with them. Don’t let me see you here again.”

  He backed away on the floor and took my advice. He took the warning and got the fuck out of here.

  People who’d been looking turned away quickly when I looked at them. Lyssa looked shaken up. I didn’t know what I was thinking, maybe it was that she’d be a little more grateful for me saving her from those guys, but she seemed the complete opposite.

  “Thank you,” she said quickly and rushed away, heading out to the break room.

  I didn’t care about the thug absence in her life for the last eight years I followed her. Something was definitely up here. I didn’t know what it was, but I sensed it.

  This wasn’t the kind of place where mafia guys would normally hang. They’d come for a pretty girl which she was, but it was like they had some entitlement to treat her that way.

  She was packing her bag when I walked in.

  There was a guy inside mopping the floor.

  “Curtis, please could you do me a favor and lock up. Tell Mark to cash up and I’ll check things over tomorrow.” She said to the guy who nodded and walked past me.

  She looked around and frowned when she saw that I’d followed her.

  “Gio, please … it’s been a long day and I just want to get home. Nice seeing you though.”

  “Nice seeing me? Really?” I shot back.

  She stared at me in disbelief.

  “What do you want me to say?” She looked me over long and hard. “Should I ask why you’re here? Should I ask you why you came back? Where you’ve been? What you want? I probably would ask all those questions if I cared for the answers. You and I have nothing to discuss so please excuse me. Thank you for defending me, it really wasn’t necessary though.”

  Not necessary my ass.

  But what was I really doing? Why was I pushing and forcing this?

  I should leave her alone.

  It was just that I couldn’t. Not like before.

  Chapter 7

  Lyssa

  * * *

  I could barely contain myself. My heart had that feeling again. Beating so fast I was certain it would beat right out of my chest.

  Twice this week now and for the same man. The same man who I allowed to affect me.

  I rushed to my car in the parking lot behind the bar eager to get away; to get far, far away.

  Get away from the unwarranted stir in my soul. I couldn’t stand it. That push and pull of emotion I shouldn’t be feeling for a man who had told me he didn’t love me.

  Damn it still hurt. It still hurt like hell.

  It was bad enough to see Gio up close and have him touch me. Bad enough to see that eight years older on him looked even sexier and gave him a rougher edge. Bad enough that my heart betrayed me and soared when I saw him walk up to me in the bar, looking at me like he used to.

  But …

  God, did he ever land me in more trouble by beating up on Tony, one of Frankie’s main guys. I didn’t know what you called them. I didn’t know what the guys were called in the mafia. I just knew Frankie was the boss and that was enough to keep myself in check. His guys came to the bar almost every night and that was how they acted. Grabbing me, trying to grope me, and more often than not succeeding.

  Fucking free drinks on the house like I could afford to give the liquor away for free and then they wanted their way with me too.

  “Lyssa,” Gio’s voice made me whirl around.

  I didn’t expect him to come after me. I thought what I’d said was enough to tell him to stay away. I didn’t need him and I didn’t need or want to feel the way I did for him.

  Everything was so fucked up and I just wanted to get home.

  I continued walking and fumbled to get my keys in my purse. By the time I found them he was right there, right beside me.

  “Lyssa, please. I just want to talk to you.” His eyes pleaded with me, but as I looked at him it just felt like this was just all too late.

  If only he’d waited for another month. Stayed with me for one month longer he would have known that I was pregnant with his child. I was pregnant at nineteen and had to go through the grief of losing not just Marshall, but him too, and realistically Dad. Dad lost his mind and ended up having to stop working altogether. Dad was in therapy and bereavement counselling for over a year. In that year I had dropped out of college, had my baby, and had to not just face reality, but be a parent too. When Dad turned to alcohol, it being so easily available to him with the bar, the debt came. His health deteriorated and he turned to Frankie for money. Now Frankie wanted me. It’s what this whole thing was about. He wanted me to fail so I could live out the rest of my life as some kind of fucking sex slave.

  Me …

  So no, I didn’t want to talk to him. There was too much to say that I couldn’t say and didn’t want to either.

  “Just leave me alone. That’s what you’re good at … Leaving. I don’t need you; I don’t need you and I don’t want to talk to you ever.” If he expected me to say anything else, it wasn’t happening.

  “Lyssa, I’m sorry I left the way I did.” His eyes widened.

  I sucked in a sharp breath. “No, there’s no need to apologize at all. You made it clear you didn’t care about me and I understood.”

  “I did care. I do care. That’s why I came here tonight. I do care about you.”

  “Gio, just stop. It’s not necessary. It’s been
eight years.” I couldn’t hold it in anymore. “If you cared that much, where were you? You could have come before now. Anything you have to say to me could have been said well before now. You didn’t care and that was the truth. You made sure I knew I was nothing to you. Little more than a stupid child who fell for you and allowed you to screw with her mind and body. You just left me here. Left me to suffer. You didn’t care if I lived or died. You just—”

  He cut my next words off by grabbing me and covering my mouth with his for a kiss. A kiss that burned my lips from the heat.

  It speared across my mouth working its way through me until it ignited every cell in my body and singed my nerves.

  Hot, wild, flames licked at my skin washing my brain clean of everything that wasn’t him.

  I wanted to think of myself as the girl I had been when we were together, but this was different. He felt different.

  The kiss was different too. He slipped his hand behind my head angling me in a way to deepen the kiss, sweeping his tongue into my mouth like he wanted to explore me. The wild, raw taste of him turned me on and tightened my nipples painfully.

  I reached up to cup his face kissing him deeper, missing him, and wanting him at the same time.

  It was the missing him part of that equation that zapped reality back into my mind.

  What the hell was I doing?

  I pulled away, stepping back out of his grasp.

  He looked at me, but didn’t say anything.

  I jumped into my car and drove away fast not looking back.

  I just drove mindlessly right back to the house; pretty certain I ran a couple of red lights too. My lips still burning from the kiss and my mind buzzing.

  When I stepped into the house the tv downstairs was on which meant Matthew was awake.

  I went inside and there he was sitting on the sofa with Dad watching Transformers.

  “Mom,” he said excitedly and rushed over to me to give me a hug. This was an early night for me. Often times I didn’t see him this side of the day. It was always in the morning and just after school. I made those hours available for him.

  His little arms around mine made me feel at home.

  “Baby, what are you doing up still?” I asked him the question and looked over at Dad who was giving me that look of defeat that told me he’d tried countless times to get Matthew to bed.

  “I couldn’t sleep.” He said.

  “Sweetie, off to bed for you. You don’t want bags under your eyes.”

  He giggled in the cute way he always did.

  He looked so much like Gio; the same thick lashes, and even the same smile.

  “Okay Mom. Goodnight Grandpa.”

  “Goodnight baby.” Dad told him.

  I went over to dad, sat opposite him on the sofa and waited to hear Matthew go up the stairs before I spoke. I didn’t tell him I’d seen Gio yet, but I felt it was best I did now.

  After that time with the whole secret of us together I promised myself that I’d never keep any more secrets from him. Didn’t matter what it was.

  He put out his hands and took mine into his. “Sweet girl, I went for a walk today. Lasted for a whole two hours before I got tired. I figure that means I could work the bar in the evenings and give you a break.”

  “Dad.” I gave his hands a gentle squeeze. “No, we can’t risk what happened last time.”

  He had a black out and fell down the stairs. Dad had liver disease. He was a lot better now than he was, but back when it was bad it was awful. I had very nearly lost him; just like Marshall.

  “It’s too much for you. I never wanted this for you and I’m so ashamed that you’re going through this.”

  “Dad no, please don’t say that. It’s going to be okay.”

  “That monster was parked outside the house today.”

  Jesus. He was talking about Frankie.

  “Dad, did he say anything to you?” My breath hitched at the thought of him doing something more to my dad.

  “No, he didn’t need to. It was like he was taunting me, telling me that he owned us. Like he could come and take my child. Do whatever he wanted to us.” Dad’s voice shook as he spoke.

  “I’ll think of something. I will.” I promised.

  “You’re doing too much. It’s good to see you home early, but dare I ask what happened.”

  I almost forgot. How could I forget what had just happened to me? I stopped for a minute and wondered how I was going to say this.

  “Gio’s back in town. He came to the bar.”

  Dad straightened and widened his eyes. “What? Really?”

  “Yeah, he’s back in town.”

  I didn’t need to tell him about the other day. Dad hated talking about anything to do with Marshall’s murder. While we didn’t keep secrets I didn’t feel it was necessary to tell him I often went to the crime scene. It was morbid and truth be told it was probably dangerous considering the parking lot was abandoned.

  “Did you speak to him?”

  “Yes,” Oh, and devoured his mouth like I hadn’t been kissed in the last eight years.

  “Lyssa–”

  I held up my hand and stopped him. “There’s nothing to worry about. You don’t have to worry about me and him. As you know you never did.”

  “Lyssa. There are some things in this world we do and we can’t take back. In my grief I blamed him for Marshall’s death. I shouldn’t have done that, and it pissed me off that he was seeing you behind my back. But he’s Matthews father, if he’s here it’s not a good thing to keep him away from him. He should know.”

  I had to confess I was very surprised to hear Dad say that; very surprised. However, I had my reasons for keeping this secret.

  “It’s best this way. I don’t want my son to experience the kind of disappointment I faced when he left. Furthermore, if he knew all that we were going through and he wanted him, he could take him. Take him away from me.” That was entirely possible.

  Gio was wealthy and as I saw tonight, something else in Chicago. The guys were scared of him. There was what he‘d done to Tony too. The man had power that was what it came down to; power.

  “Sweetheart, if he sees that boy he’ll take one look at him and know the kid is his. He’s the spitting image. There’s no hiding that.”

  I didn’t want to think about that tonight, though he was completely right. I just didn’t want to have to contemplate anything more.

  “I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.”

  Another squeeze on my hands gave me some reassurance.

  “You’re the strongest woman I know Lyssa. I’m proud of you. I want to do right by you. I know I’m to be blamed for Gio leaving.”

  “No, Dad. You know what he’s like. If he really wanted to, he would have stayed, or come back before now.”

  “Did he say why he came back?”

  “No. I don’t know why he’s back.” I didn’t know and I figured it was best I didn’t find out.

  The reason wasn’t me, so it was none of my concern.

  As for that kiss, I just needed to forget it and chalk it up to one of those strange occurrences I couldn’t explain.

  Better to think of it like that.

  I had too much on my plate to worry about and who knew what tonight’s stir would cause with Frankie.

  It actually made me physically sick to think about it.

  The man seemed to have some obsession with wanting me to fail.

  I couldn’t let him win. I just didn’t know how I was going to get through all of this and get him out of my life.

  It seemed like no matter what he’d always be there; everywhere and anywhere.

  Chapter 8

  Gio

  * * *

  Last night was branded into my mind, in my memory.

  I couldn’t’ sleep. I just kept thinking about what must have happened to Lyssa when I left eight years ago.

  I left to give her a chance to be who she was supposed to be. Become the dream she’d wanted, but la
st night told a different story. One I was actually afraid to find out. And, I wasn’t the guy to be afraid of anything. Not me.

  Finding out she suffered however had me shit scared, because it took everything in me to leave her here and now knowing it had been the wrong thing …

  Knowing I made the wrong choice again would kill me.

  “Hey, try to focus. This place looks off.” Dante whispered, leaning close.

  He wasn’t wrong. The place looked more than off and saying that was putting it mildly.

  “I got my eyes open.” I nodded. I was miles away in my mind consumed with thoughts of Lyssa, brain fried from that kiss I couldn’t stop myself from giving her. My eyes were open, had been since we parked our bikes and had to travel the rest of the way on foot so as not to draw attention to ourselves.

  Myself, Dante, and Gibbs were in the depths of what we classed the worst of the bad areas. We called it The Den, named so because of the amount of thieves and gangsters who hung out here. It was in the crevice between Chinatown and Franklin Square.

  The place was shady as shit and the kind of place you’d go to if you wanted black market stuff. Serious shit like a kidney or a limb. Fuck, they even had the hook up for some types of surgical procedures I didn’t know existed. Things like screwing up your finger prints and even screwing up your blood type. It was shit I didn’t get into, because you knew those types of things would eventually kill you. It just bought you some time and freedom if that was what you desired.

  One of the guys on my list had directed Gibbs here.

  It was a guy from one of Marshall’s support groups who Marshall did a favor for once.

  He never said what the favor was, but I knew the guy as someone Marshall worked with after high school. His name was Willis. He’d cleaned up a lot since that time, but may have given us valuable information. He contacted someone here he thought could give us some more information.

  A woman called Jade. We got here five minutes ago. Knocked on a door with some Chinese characters on it that was tucked away in between some market stalls and were led inside to a waiting room that looked like a doctor’s surgery. It looked like this place was for herbal remedies, it just wasn’t advertising as such.